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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23272048">What I See Inside</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/shepersisted/pseuds/shepersisted'>shepersisted</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Hamilton - Miranda</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - Royalty, Assassination, F/M, Kings &amp; Queens, M/M</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-03-23</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-03-17</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-01 08:14:11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>7</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>11,959</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23272048</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/shepersisted/pseuds/shepersisted</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Alexander Hamilton was born to be the king. </p><p>An alternate universe where Alexander Hamilton is the adopted son of the royal family, the Washingtons, who have ruled their kingdom peacefully for centuries. When the throne is threatened and assassinations become a possibility, the John and Henry Laurens are brought in to guard the family. </p><p>When Alexander meets his only chance at safety, nothing is ever the same again.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Alexander Hamilton &amp; George Washington, Alexander Hamilton/Elizabeth "Eliza" Schuyler, Alexander Hamilton/John Laurens, John Laurens &amp; Elizabeth "Eliza" Schuyler</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>48</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Alexander Hamilton was born to be the king. </p><p>From the moment he could open his eyes, that was all anyone ever told him. Although not biologically the son of the king and queen, he was chosen as a child from the orphanage when they found that they were unable to have children. The king and queen claimed that some higher power moved them to choose Alexander from the crowd. </p><p>From a young age, it was clear that he was different. He was talking, reading, and writing at an earlier age than most. Some called him a genius, but the king and queen did their best to keep that kind of talk away from him. They knew it was not in his best interest to give him that kind of ego boost when he was already a prince. Instead, they put immense pressure on him to continue his studies and focus on his education. </p><p>Even though he spent a good amount of time in the castle with private tutors and classwork, he did have a few friends. The daughters of the king’s right hand man, the Schuyler sisters. The middle sister, Eliza, was the closest to him as they were the same age. They grew up running down the hallways together and playing games in the West Wing of the castle. </p><p>“Ah, he finally emerges!” Angelica teased as Alexander came into the room where they spent most of their time. It was an extension of the library, a sunroom with shelves full of books and natural light that practically poured into the space.</p><p>Alexander practically collapsed into one of the chairs. “Today’s session was particularly long for no good reason. It seems like Samuel doesn’t enjoy teaching me, he enjoys torturing me.”</p><p>Eliza gave him a sympathetic look. “Did you learn anything today?”</p><p>“Yes, we’ve finally reached the past century’s agricultural history after spending the past two weeks on the rest of the centuries of agricultural history,” he replied, giving her a bored look. “I’m very aware of how grain is processed in this kingdom.”</p><p>Eliza did everything she could to stifle a chuckle. “Well, you’ll be a very informed king, that’s for sure.”</p><p>Alexander gave her a half smile and sighed, mostly out of exhaustion, “Yeah, well, I think that’s what they’re counting on. It’s not even like my father is close to death, they just want me to be prepared. But I can’t wait to be the king. I’m ready now.”</p><p>Eliza laughed at him a little. They were both only 12, and she knew he was nowhere near becoming king. It was hard for her to picture her best friend leading a country. </p><p>“It’s hard to even imagine the kingdom without King George, but I’m sure you’ll be fine,” Angelica remarked. Alexander just rolled his eyes and ignored their teasing.</p><p>Hoping to relieve them of a practical conversation, Eliza got down on the floor where her sister Peggy was laying out a board game. “Alex, do you want to play? Peggy’s practically been begging us all morning.” </p><p>“Have not!” Peggy exclaimed.</p><p>“Have too!” Eliza shot right back. “C’mon Alex, will you play?”</p><p>Eliza was the only one who ever called Alexander, ‘Alex’. Somewhere along the way, she decided that she could and it just stuck. Even Peggy, who was only six years old, called him Alexander. Outside of the castle, he was only addressed as ‘Prince Alexander’. ‘Alex’ was reserved specifically for Eliza, and he intended on keeping it that way. </p><p>He smiled as he took his position in front of the board. “Of course I’ll play.”</p><p>                                                                                 ~</p><p>Alexander’s two hour break was done before they had even finished the game. Even Angelica got in on the action, laughing along with them. Sometimes, being fifteen years old, she acted like she was too old to play with them, but deep down she knew that her sisters and Alexander were her best friends. </p><p>Their game was ended by Charles, King George’s personal assistant and Alexander’s personal version of hell. “Prince Alexander, get up off the floor,” he demanded with a tone of disgust. “Your father requests you at dinner. You have guests this evening.”</p><p>Angelica, Eliza, and Peggy watched as Alexander slowly rose and smoothed out his crumpled clothing. “Do you know who’s here?”</p><p>“Who is, Alexander. Who is,” Charles sighed. “I’m not sure who the guest is, but your father made them seem important.” As if noticing the girls for the first time, he added. “Your presence is required as well. Your father will be in attendance.”</p><p>Eliza grinned. She was always one to jump at the chance to be a part of important conversations in the same room as her best friend. She sprang to her feet and looked at her sisters frantically. “Should we change?”</p><p>Charles didn’t wait for an answer from the girls. “You should. Alexander, you should as well. Come with me. We’ll see you in the dining room at 6:30 sharp, girls.” With a quick turn on his heel, he left, expecting Alexander to follow behind him.</p><p>Alexander shot the three of them an apologetic glance before walking quickly to catch up to Charles. The girls waited for the door to close before Eliza grinned from ear to ear and took both of their hands. “C’mon, let’s go get ready!”</p><p>Peggy matched Eliza’s enthusiasm, not knowing any better, but Angelica frowned. “Eliza, don’t get your hopes up. This probably isn’t going to be any fun.”</p><p>“Yes, but Angelica, don’t you see? We’re going to be a part of it,” she said, her eyes gleaming with excitement. “Alex is going to be king someday. It’s about time we start acting like it.”</p><p>Angelica snorted. “And what, you his queen?”</p><p>“Gross!” Peggy immediately exclaimed. </p><p>“Yuck,” Eliza nodded in agreement. “I want to be a part of the royal staff. I’m not going to marry Alex.”</p><p>Angelica, feeling that because she was older and knew better, rolled her eyes and said, “Sure. C’mon, let’s go get dressed. Can’t look like we’ve been playing monopoly on the ground for the past two hours.”</p><p>“But we have!” Peggy said, smiling up at Angelica with her signature toothy grin. </p><p>Angelica laughed a little and ruffled her hair, which made her groan. “Let’s go,” she finally said. Eliza quickly ran ahead, Peggy doing her best to keep up with her.</p><p>                                                                                         ~</p><p>Since the kids were old enough to attend the dinners with their parents, there was always one clear rule. You did not speak unless spoken to. Alexander in particular had trouble following that rule, and he had since he was a kid. Some guests found it entertaining, others found it disrespectful. Alexander just couldn’t help himself. The king and queen understood, but were quick to scold when it wasn’t his place to make a comment. Nowadays, he was being asked to more and more dinners. Alexander assumed it was all a part of his training to become king.</p><p>This dinner was no different, except for the fact that he had Eliza in the chair next to him. She, though still just as young and rambunctious as he was, was a calming presence for him. He didn’t feel the pressure of the world as much when they were together. He could just pretend it was just the two of them, talking and playing a game of pretend.</p><p>At the dinner was a man he had never seen before, but his presence certainly put his father on edge. Alexander didn’t like the looks of the man. He was too clean cut, and he never quite looked directly at the person he was speaking to. He just simply made them uncomfortable, and there was something different about the air in the room this time.</p><p>After 20 minutes of awkward small talk that no one was enjoying, the man spoke up, clearing his throat to indicate the importance of his words. “King George, as you know I’ve come here on your brother Ben’s behalf to discuss the future of this kingdom.”</p><p>Alexander practically dropped his fork in shock. “You have a brother?” He had always been told that he, and he alone, was the only heir to the throne. A brother put a wrench in that entire plan.</p><p>King George, however, was not phased at all. He didn’t even answer Alexander’s question. “Yes, I understand. But as you know, Ben has been banished from the kingdom for committing crimes. He has no rights to the throne.”</p><p>The man chuckled with a slight twinkle in his eye, giving off the air that he knew something that they didn’t. The king’s grip around his wine glass tightened. “Oh, my dear king. If only you had thought this through. As you should know, the doctrine clearly states that only a man or woman with blood relation to the family crest may take over as the leader of our great kingdom. It’s on page 107. Maybe you never got that far.”</p><p>His tone was condescending and rude. Alexander couldn’t take it anymore. “Don’t you dare speak to my father that way!” </p><p>“Alexander,” King George practically roared. The fire in his eyes shut Alexander up faster than anything ever had before. He evened out his temper before turning to speak to the man again. “I’ve read the clause, but the kingdom has accepted Alexander as my son after learning that my wife and I could not have children. Alexander is the new heir to the throne.”</p><p>“Not if we have anything to say about it,” the man replied firmly, the same stupid twinkle in his eye. After a moment of stunned silence, he stood up and wiped his mouth before saying, “Well, I should be going. I look forward to seeing you again soon, my king.”</p><p>King George clasped his hands together, deep in thought, and allowed the man to leave without a proper farewell. The queen placed a gentle hand on his thigh. “We’re going to figure this out. We won’t allow him to take the throne.”</p><p>Alexander was quick to speak up as well. “She’s right. We have a long time before anyone else would need to take the throne anyway. I’ll scour the doctrine. There must be something we can do.”</p><p>“Your people are behind you,” Mr. Schuyler added, prompting enthusiastic nods from the girls. </p><p>“All of this is very preemptive. We have years before I should be even close to death. By then, Alexander will be more than prepared to be king, and my brother will be just as old and feeble as I.” The king seemed confident in his words, leading the rest of the room to be as well.</p><p>“For now, we will take extra precaution in your outings, sire. Just in case they are planning something,” Mr. Schulyer added.</p><p>“Like an assassination?” Alexander asked, prompting worried glances from the adults in the room.</p><p>“Yes, Alexander,” Mr. Schuyler sighed, “an assasination.”</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. The Arrival</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>"When she caught his eye, she drank in the smile he gave her. They were rare, and ever so forgiving in their nature."</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>3 YEARS LATER</p><p>From that point on, things were taken much more seriously in the castle. Alexander was made to study from dawn until dusk, leaving little time for games with the Schuyler sisters. Security was increased in an attempt to keep the king out of harm’s way. </p><p>Eventually, everyone fell into a rhythm and this ‘new way of life’ became their normal. The sisters started to take up new duties around the castle and each girl was acutely aware of how quickly their childhoods had slipped away. Everything revolved around the safety of the king. </p><p>On a day that Eliza knew Alex had a bit of free time, she paid him a visit. She knocked softly on his door before entering the room, where she found Alex reading the kingdom’s doctrine yet again.</p><p>“You know, staring at it won’t change the words,” she smiled.</p><p>Alex looked up, as if hearing her enter for the first time and sighed lightly. “I read it every few weeks to see if I can find something that I didn’t see before.”</p><p>“You can’t fix this, Alex,” she reminded him lightly.</p><p>“You don’t know that,” he snapped. Eliza’s mouth twitched. Alex had been snapping at her like that a lot more lately, mostly out of stress. She stayed by the door, thinking she might leave. Everyone always relied on Eliza to be a confidant for Alex, but the more he started to sink into his so-called ‘destiny’ of becoming king, the more she didn’t want to be around him.</p><p>“You’re right. I don’t,” she replied plainly. He looked up at her and sighed.</p><p>“Eliza, I’m sorry. I’ve just been stressed lately.” The apology was half-assed, only given because he could see that she was annoyed with him. </p><p>Eliza closed her eyes and took a deep breath, doing her best to remember her purpose in visiting him. If she couldn’t do so as a friend, she could at least do it as his right hand man. The person she aspired to be. </p><p>“What did you study today?” She asked, carefully sitting in the chair next to him.</p><p>“Foreign policy,” he replied, standing and putting the doctrine back in its place.</p><p>“May I see the documents you studied?” Eliza was always asking to study what Alex had studied that day. It was her way of keeping up with him, since his studies were valued and hers were not.</p><p>He chuckled, going to his desk and handing her the day’s work. “You know Eliza, I’ve never met a woman that was as interested in studying as you.” When she caught his eye, she drank in the smile he gave her. They were rare, and ever so forgiving in their nature. “I envy you, being able to study without the pressure of using the information for the life or death of your people.”</p><p>“I think my knowing this information is life or death,” she replied simply, scanning the documents. “I’ll return them to you in the morning, as usual.” In reality, it wasn’t just the documents she was reading, it was Alex’s notes on the side of the paper. His analysis was usually worth more than the document itself.</p><p>“I look forward to it.” He then watched as Eliza read his notes, marveling at the girl who he believed had an interesting and exciting life ahead of her. His own life, however, was already written in the stars. He didn’t seem to have a choice any longer. “Eliza?” He asked after a few minutes.</p><p>“Yes?” </p><p>“We’re friends, aren’t we?” Eliza looked up from the documents with a slightly sad, but surprised look on her face. She had noticed the shift in their relationship, but she never had been quite sure if he did.</p><p>“I don’t know, Prince Alexander,” she challenged, the name causing him a bit of anguish. “Are we?”</p><p>There was a moment of silence before Angelica burst through the door. “I’m sorry to bother you, but Alexander, you must come quick. There was an assaination attempt against your father.” Quickly, the previous conversation was forgotten and the three teenagers raced out of Alex’s quarters to go get more information.</p><p>The king was visiting a local hospital filled with men that had been wounded in a battle to protect their land. The assassin planted himself in the hospital before the king arrived, and shot in a rare moment of vulnerability. Luckily, the assassin was shot on the spot and the king was only left with a wound from the bullet grazing his arm. Still, it was enough to shake the kingdom. </p><p>It was decided that the king needed a new head of security. While Mr. Schuyler was very good at his job, he simply had too much on his plate. With Alexander now 15 years old, he would start to become a target as well if he could not reach the king himself. The new appointed head, Henry Laurens, was from a neighboring kingdom in their alliance. His son, John Laurens, who was 17 years old and in training, would come with him to specifically aid the prince. Henry assured the king that John was much more competent than any actual officer he had. It was in his blood. </p><p>The day the Laurens family was to arrive, the sisters were gossiping as they went about their daily business.</p><p>“I’ve heard the son is quite handsome,” Eliza giggled. They were going through letters from the subjects of the kingdom, deciphering which would need responses. Even Peggy was employed to help when she could.</p><p>	“And here I was thinking you weren’t interested in boys!” Angelica laughed. “Every time anyone brings up the discussion of Alexander’s queen...”</p><p>“Because I do not want to be his queen!” Eliza sighed, rolling her eyes slightly. “I want to take over Father’s position. I am not meant to sit next to a man and look pretty. Besides, I plan on asking father if I can study under him soon.”</p><p>Angelica did not say anything to that. There had been whispers about Eliza’s future with Alex’s impending kingship, and she did not want to say anything that would dampen her sister’s spirit. </p><p>“That’s so cool, ‘Liza,” Peggy smiled. </p><p>“I’ve heard that the man is very strict,” Angelica said, changing the subject, “and his son is as well.”</p><p>“Perhaps that’s what we need with the attempt on King George,” Eliza replied worriedly. “I do not want him or Alex to be in any danger.”</p><p>“Girls,” Mr. Schuyler said, entering the room. “I need you in the foyer. Mr. Laurens and his son have just arrived and we need to properly greet them.” </p><p>All three girls jumped at the chance. The Schuylers would be the first to greet the new staff, and then they would be led to the royal family. </p><p>As soon as they walked in, Eliza realized why they were hired. The Laurens men were very stoic and had a large presence as soon as they came into the room. They were clearly a force to be reckoned with. The father, Henry, was a bit shorter than his son and heftier, but you could tell it would take a lot to knock him down. </p><p>John Laurens, however, Eliza couldn’t help but stare at. He was built with muscle and long, curly hair that he had tied up in a ponytail. His eyes were a piercing blue, and his face was dotted with freckles that made him look a bit more youthful. Eliza was suddenly envious that Alex would get to spend so much time with him. For a moment, she allowed herself a bit of hope that this was the change they all needed to move forward.</p><p>“Henry and John,” Mr. Schuyler said, shaking their hands. “We are very grateful to have you here. I am Philip, the king’s right hand, and these are my daughters: Angelica, Eliza, and Peggy.” </p><p>Neither of the men smiled, but the girls curtsied anyway. “It’s a pleasure to meet you both,” Eliza said softly, speaking for her sisters. Every day, she tried to prove to her father that she had what it took to be his apprentice. </p><p>“Eliza will take you to the throne room where the royal family waits for you.” Still, the men said nothing and did not smile, but simply nodded as Eliza began to lead them through the castle.</p><p>Hating the silence coming from them, Eliza attempted to start a conversation with the men as she led them through the hall. “We are very grateful to have you both here. My sister, Angelica, is about your age, John.” John looked to her and simply nodded, causing Eliza to resign to silence once again. “You will be living across the hall from us.”</p><p>They didn’t speak again until they entered the throne room. “King George,” Henry said, bowing. His son did the same.</p><p>“Please, there’s no need to bow. You’ll find that we’re a little more relaxed around here,” the king said with an easy smile. The queen and the prince flanked either side of him.</p><p>Henry smiled back. “Perhaps that’s why I’ve been called here.”</p><p>Eliza’s smile fell, as well as the rest of the room. Things had changed with the assassination attempt, and they would never be the same with the arrival of the Laurens men. </p><p>~</p><p>After the official greetings, Eliza led John to his new quarters, still hoping for a friendship that would blossom when they were alone. After his long term silence in her presence, however, she decided to be quick about her business and leave the friendship for another day. “The bathroom is through that door, and then Alex’s quarters are down the -” </p><p>“Alex?” He interrupted, looking around the room but not in the direction of Eliza.</p><p>“Prince Alexander,” she corrected, her head hanging slightly. After a few moments of silence as John continued to look around the room, she said, “I should be going. If you need anything else -”</p><p>“The two of you are close, then?” He interrupted again, this time looking straight to her. </p><p>Eliza hesitated. Instead of the truth, she told him what everyone expected her to say. “I am the prince’s closest confidant.” John nodded, and they sat in the uncomfortable silence yet again. “We have been friends since we were children,” she added with a bit of uneasiness in her tone.</p><p>John smiled for the first time since his arrival. Eliza gratefully smiled back. “You don’t seem so sure about that.” Oh, how quickly her smile fell. He seemed to almost relish in the awkwardness that Eliza felt. </p><p>She tucked a strand of hair behind her ear and stood a bit taller. “Frankly, I don’t believe my personal relationship with the prince is any of your business,” she said firmly, feeling the need to defend herself. “If you’ll be needing anything else, Mr. Laurens, my quarters are-”</p><p>“Does he treat you like his servant?” He asked, interrupting yet again. For a man that spent so much time being silent, he certainly had a lot to say now. Eliza bit her lip in restless frustration and crossed her arms. Before she could get a word in, he continued, “Because you seem to act like one.”</p><p>He sat on his bed, staring at Eliza with the same smile she had enjoyed moments ago. Now, the smile was laced with judgement. “I am simply doing what is asked of me,” she said firmly.</p><p>“Ah,” he replied simply. </p><p>“Will that be all?” She asked with an edge.</p><p>“That will be all.” </p><p>Eliza nodded and left the room, silently fuming. She had such high hopes for John’s presence in the castle, but now she could see that she would have yet another arrogant man to deal with on a daily basis. She had allowed herself to hope, even if only for a moment, that this man would be her saving grace. But Eliza knew better than to look for princes on white horses. Even her real life prince couldn’t give her the time of day.</p><p>John did not sit in his room for long before making his way to Alexander’s quarters, not bothering to knock before entering. He was reading, as he usually was, but still found his face flushing a bright red to have John walk into his quarters unannounced and see him in such an informal state.</p><p>“What are you doing here?” He quickly asked, putting down his book. </p><p>John did not wait for an invitation to come in, but instead sat in the chair next to Alexander’s. “Relax, Prince Alexander. I just came by to say hello. I thought it was fit that we get to know each other since we’ll be spending so much time together.”</p><p>“For the record, I don’t need a babysitter,” he quipped, offended by his presence. “I study day in and day out. I never leave this fucking castle. No one’s going to hurt me, so you might as well relax and have a good time.”</p><p>John raised an eyebrow. “Prince Alexander, I don’t believe you understand the matter at hand here. My father and I were hired to keep you safe, and that’s what I intend to do. Now I am sorry if you don’t like it, but please do not ask me to not do my job.”</p><p>John was firm in the way he spoke, but it was not threatening. He studied him for a moment, taking in this man that believed he had a higher power than a prince. He was much taller than Alex, towering over him by about six inches. What Alex found most striking, however, were his eyes, which were a piercing blue and followed Alex’s every movement.</p><p>For once in his life, Alex felt slightly inadequate. “I am going to be the king,” he pushed. “I tell you what to do.” John stifled a laugh and Alex quipped, “That isn’t funny.”</p><p>“No, it is not,” John agreed, still holding back a laugh. “But I will not have you treat me as you treat your other ‘friends’ in this castle.” The look of confusion on Alex’s face was telling. “We have defense training tomorrow in the courtyard. 6 AM sharp.”</p><p>“Absolutely not.”</p><p>John smiled again. “We’ll see about that.”</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. First Day</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>"He didn’t want to just be some stuck up Prince that John had to babysit."</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Alex woke up to a bit of a shock the next morning, covered in ice cold water with John Laurens standing above him, grinning. </p><p>“Good morning!” He said cheerfully. </p><p>Alex glared at him, immediately standing up and grabbing a towel. “What the hell did you do that for?” He started to dry his hair and wipe off his face, feeling weird about removing his wet clothes in front of the other man.</p><p>“I told you. 6 am sharp. You weren’t awake, so I figured I’d give you a bit of a wakeup call.” John Laurens looked very pleased with himself. Alex couldn’t say for sure, but it looked like the man gave him a once over in his soaking wet clothing. “Now get changed, and meet me on the field in 15 minutes. I’ll leave a note for your maid to come clean this all up.”</p><p>Still disgruntled and thoroughly annoyed, the prince shot back, “I know you think I’m spoiled, but I don’t have a maid. I’ll clean it myself.”</p><p>“Really?” John asked. He seemed genuinely curious, but Alex knew there was a bit of judgment behind his question. “Then who was that girl that showed me around yesterday? I figured she was your servant of sorts.”</p><p>Alex’s face fell, but he didn’t want John to perceive him as weak, so he narrowed his eyes. “Eliza isn’t my servant, she’s my friend. I’ll clean this up and then I’ll be down at the field in a moment.” </p><p>Understanding he had been dismissed, John nodded. “I think we’re going to have a lot of fun working together, Prince Alexander.”</p><p>Alex didn’t respond, but instead turned his back to him and began to peel off his shirt. Alex couldn’t be sure, but he was almost positive that John had snuck a quick glance before walking out the door. <br/>After changing his clothes, Alex looked around for the clean sheets and came up empty. He thought that maybe he could do it, but deep down he really knew he was putting on a face for John. He didn’t exactly know why, but he wanted to prove something to him. He didn’t want to just be some stuck up Prince that John had to babysit.</p><p>Swallowing his pride, Alex walked out of the room and softly knocked on the door to Eliza’s quarters. Still in her night garments, Eliza rubbed her eyes and opened the door. “Alex? It’s early, what are you doing here?”</p><p>“I need your help,” He admitted. She nodded, closing the door quietly to not wake her sisters, and followed him to his room. He almost enjoyed seeing her this way, still slightly drenched in sleep. She had her guard down, which was rare for Eliza. In the bright light of the morning, Alex felt almost guilty looking at her.</p><p>“What happened?” She asked when he entered the room, seeing the soaking wet bed. </p><p>“John thought it would be fun to wake me up with a bit of ice cold water for morning ‘drills’. I don’t know where the spare sheets are.” Eliza stifled a light laugh, and walked into the closet and pulled the sheets out of the bottom drawer.</p><p>“Seems like he’s going to give you a run for your money,” she said softly, still looking half asleep. Alex took a moment to admire her as they stripped the bed together. Without makeup and her hair still a mess, he knew Eliza was still the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. </p><p>After a moment, he gathered up the courage and said, “John said that he thought you were my servant. Isn’t that funny? I mean, you’re obviously...” He looked up and caught her eye, where she gave him a blank stare. “My friend. You’re obviously my friend, Eliza.”</p><p>Eliza didn’t say anything and began to put on the new sheets with him.</p><p>Not one to handle silence, Alex continued, “Eliza-”</p><p>“Enough, Alex, it’s too early. I don’t want to talk about this.”</p><p>Alex paused. “Well maybe you don’t consider yourself my friend but I consider myself yours. If- if you ever thought for a moment that I’ve treated you as less than that, then I’m sorry.”</p><p>Sort of taken aback by the apology, Eliza nodded a little. She chose her next words carefully. “Things are changing fairly quickly, and I just never knew where we stood. You don’t ever seem to want to hang out with me anymore unless we’re talking about your impending kingship. It didn’t always used to be like that.”</p><p>“It won’t be like that anymore, I promise,” he replied softly. “You’re my only friend, Eliza.”</p><p>Realizing the truth in that, Eliza nodded. She desperately wanted to believe him. “Then, as your friend, you should go find John. I wouldn’t mess around with that guy.” Then, she smiled, and Alex smiled back, and for the first time in a long time, things felt normal.</p><p>Alex began a light jog out to the field to meet John. He expected to see some sort of fancy equipment to train with, but it was just John standing in the middle of the field with a couple of weights around him.</p><p>“See, was that so hard?” He grinned.</p><p>“I’d like to smack that grin off your face.”</p><p>“I’m sure you would,” he replied, still grinning. “We’ll do this every day except Sundays to get you in shape. Rather than just increase your security, I’d prefer you to be able to fight for yourself.”</p><p>John Laurens had changed into a tank top and athletic shorts, showing off his toned muscles that seemed to almost shine under the morning sunlight. Alex couldn’t help but feel inadequate standing next to him. John only had two years on him, but that seemed to be everything.</p><p>“I can’t exactly fight off a gunshot,” Alex quipped, crossing his arms.</p><p>“No, but you can let me and my father deal with the possible snipers. You need to be prepared for everything else. You are at a great risk, Prince Alexander.” When Alex looked down at the ground in thought, his arms still folded, he added, “Don’t you value your own life enough to work to keep it?”</p><p>Alex’s head snapped up. “Let’s just get to work.”</p><p>“Music to my ears.”</p><p>The workout John had prepared for Alex was no joke. The warmup was a 5 mile run and it didn’t stop there. John had him sprinting, lifting weights, and eventually working on hand to hand combat as his partner. By the end of it, Alex was soaked in sweat and John looked like he had barely taken a jog. He sat on the ground with his legs spread, quickly drinking a water bottle.</p><p>“You did good today,” John offered lightly.</p><p>Alex rolled his eyes. “No I didn’t. That was sad.”</p><p>“I threw a lot at you. You’ll get better with time.” John seemed very certain of that fact, but Alex wasn’t so sure. He finished his water bottle and laid in the grass, taking deep breaths. </p><p>“I’m better at intellectual stuff.” John nodded a little, giving Alex the moment to rest. After sitting in the silence for a few minutes to catch his breath, Alex said, “I talked to Eliza this morning. About what you said. We’re cool.”</p><p>John raised an eyebrow. “You’re cool?”</p><p>Alex nodded. “It was just a bit of miscommunication. She felt as if I was treating her like my... servant, as you said.” He became visibly uncomfortable as he spoke, knowing he was in the wrong. “But Eliza is my friend. I intend to treat her as such from now on.”</p><p>“She’s nothing more than your friend?” He asked, looking at him directly. His muscles gleamed in the sunlight and Alex used the sheer force of willpower not to stare. John is nothing but marvelous, although Alex is sure he will never admit it to the man.</p><p>“No,” Alex said, shaking his head. “She’s more than that. If someone were to hurt Eliza, I’d kill everyone involved. One by one.” Alex is almost surprised to hear the words come out of his mouth. It was something he had never admitted, and maybe not even known about himself. But, as soon as he said it, he knew it was true. More than anything, he felt intensely over his relationship with Eliza. </p><p>Even John seemed to be surprised by Alex’s candor. “Protective,” he remarked. “But it isn’t love?” He almost seemed to be testing him, even teasing him, but Alex couldn’t be sure. With everything he said, he was stoic and calm. </p><p>“I’m not sure any fifteen year old can be certain what love is, but if I had to guess, I’d say I am in love with Eliza.” He says it quietly, almost like a secret. “But love takes its time. Eliza and I will take our time as well.”</p><p>“Is she to be your queen?” John pushes. Alex doesn’t say a word, but instead stands and starts walking across the field. </p><p>My Queen. Alexander replays the phrase as he walks away with John’s laughter in the distance. “Too far?” He calls, finding the whole thing to be amusing. Still, Alex says nothing and walks back to his quarters to change before another grueling day of studying.</p><p>Elizabeth Hamilton. My love. My Queen. The thought, though seemingly the oracle of the future, made Alex’s stomach turn.</p>
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<a name="section0004"><h2>4. The Queen</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>"The word ‘Queen’ felt like poison in her mouth."</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>If there was one thing Elizabeth Schuyler knew to her core, it was that she was not meant to be the Queen. After a month of having the Laurens men in residence, the whispers around the castle about that very rumor started to intensify. On one afternoon, Eliza decided to squash those rumors once and for all. If she had anything to say about her future, it would not consist of a marriage to Alexander Hamilton. </p><p>Eliza wipes her hands on her skirt as she paces Alex’s office on the hot, May afternoon. Alex was finishing his training with John. They had added a session in the afternoon, much to Alex’s outward chagrin, though Eliza was beginning to think that he might actually enjoy their sessions. With more physical sessions, however, he had less time for his studies, which Eliza despised. The less Alex learned, the less she learned as well. </p><p>After many long minutes, Alex entered his study with a smile on his face and sweat on his brow. “Eliza,” he said with delight, sitting at his desk. “To what do I owe the pleasure?”</p><p>Her nerves were not calmed by his presence, although she had hoped they would be. “I am going to speak to my father today, and I was hoping for a bit of encouragement.” </p><p>“Before your sixteenth birthday?” He asked with a hint of surprise. Eliza was 4 months away from being sixteen, the age that most children in their kingdom took on apprenticeships. He knew of Eliza’s dream to become his aide, but admittedly had not taken it very seriously.</p><p>Eliza hesitated. She could not tell him the real reason why she was speaking with her father in advance. Although she did not want to marry him, the thought of possibly hurting his feelings was too much to bear. “I cannot wait any longer,” she replied with a bit of an edge, collapsing in a chair.</p><p>He chuckled. “Eliza, you have nothing to fear. Your father loves and trusts you.” </p><p>She waved a hand. “Distract me. Tell me about your day with John.”</p><p>Alex felt the smile tug at his lips as he thought about the endless hours in the hot sun with John over the past few weeks. He was improving steadily. As much as he meant to, for fear that the rigorous training hours would end and John would be sent away. The man was a mystery; a block of stone that Alex felt he was just beginning to crack. </p><p>“His idea of a warm up is a 10 mile run, Eliza,” Alex sighed with carefully crafted disdain. “The man is a terror, and he doesn’t let up.”</p><p>Empathetic, Eliza nodded, “Perhaps you should ask the King for a bit of a break. God knows you could use it.” Her eyes lit up. “See! This is the kind of thing that I could see to as your aide.”</p><p>“Eliza, my greatest wish for you is that you become more than my aide,” he replied truthfully. The concept of Eliza becoming his Queen sat low in his stomach. His father had mentioned it to him just the other day, and once again he changed the subject under the guise that he was much too young to be concerning himself with marriage. His father let it go, but he knew that he wouldn’t do so for long.</p><p>“You and I both know that the position, under your Kingship, would mean more to me than anything.” The giddiness in her voice was unmistakable. “I have been learning just as you, Alex.”</p><p>He softened. “I know, Eliza. You would be a wonderful aide.”</p><p>“Then I have your blessing?” </p><p>His brows furrowed. “You do not need it. You never did.”</p><p>“It is still nice to have,” she smiled. “I’m going to go speak with him now. Wish me luck!” With that, she was out the door, and the pit in Alex’s stomach grew larger than before. </p><p>~</p><p>With an anxious hand, Eliza knocked on her father’s office door. He responded with a stern ‘come in’ and she entered with a smile which he returned. “Ah, Elizabeth! I had been hoping you would visit. I have a few things here for Alexander, and I thought it would be best that you gave them to him today.”</p><p>He went to hand her the files, but she cut him off. “Actually, Father, I was hoping I could speak to you about something of importance.”</p><p>He nodded with the seriousness he offered everyone that worked in the castle. Her father was professional at the least, but he was still her father and his words were always laced with kindness for his daughters. “Sit, sit.”</p><p>Eliza did as she was told, and took a deep breath, hoping her voice would not shake as she spoke. “I wanted to discuss my apprenticeship with you. I think it is time that I take my place as your apprentice, Father. I have been studying every single day. Everything that Alex touches, I read as well. His notes, his thoughts - I have studied them all. Plus, I am the prince’s closest confidant, and no one would serve better than me as his aide as he transitions to kingship. This is my dream, and I would be extremely humbled if you considered my proposal.”</p><p>It was a speech that she had rehearsed in her head time and time again. It could not be too emotional, as her father did not respond well to emotion, and it could not be too lengthy. She hoped and prayed that this would be the thing that would push her over the edge.</p><p>Mr. Schuyler took a lengthy pause, his hands clasped together as he considered his daughter’s words. “Elizabeth, I thought you understood your place. I thought Angelica had discussed it with you, or Alexander himself. The King has even discussed it with Alexander. If your mother was here, she would have...” He trailed off, searching for the right words.</p><p>Eliza’s face fell, a cold feeling wracking her body. “I don’t understand.”</p><p>“You are promised to Alexander. You have been since you were a child.” He paused, and Eliza willed herself not to succumb to sobs. “The training and the studying has all been preparation for you to become a thoughtful and well-informed Queen. I am sorry if you thought it was anything more.”</p><p>“This is something you choose to tell me now?” She choked, the tears brimming her eyes. “Alex and Angelica have never said a word. There have only been whispers.”</p><p>“I thought you understood, Elizabeth. I swear it.” For a moment, he almost looked sorry. “Even now, you call him Alex. The only one to do so. There is no woman more fit than you to be his Queen.” He did not see that as damnation. It was the best life he could imagine for her. </p><p>Not wanting to break down in front of her father, Eliza left without another word, her anger blindly carrying her all the way to Alex’s quarters.</p><p>She flung open the door, her manners left behind with the trace of her dreams that were shattered. “You knew!” She screamed. Alex rose from his book, his face of concentration exchanged for one of concern and guilt. “I am promised to you, and you did not say a word!”</p><p>“Eliza-” He started, but she was quick to cut him off.</p><p>“Oh, please bless me with your words, Prince Alexander. Please explain your way out of this one. Win me over with your charm as you have done again and again.” The sarcasm was Eliza’s best defense mechanism, and Alex had heard it again and again. </p><p>So, he did exactly what she did not expect of him. He told the truth. “You’re right. I knew,” he said candidly. “I have only known for a month or so, but I knew. The King tells me Angelica has known much longer.”</p><p>“I thought you were my friend.” Her words were bitter and cold. </p><p>“I am your friend, Eliza,” he said softly.</p><p>“Is this why you have been treating me differently? Because I am to be your wife? Your Queen?” The word ‘Queen’ felt like poison in her mouth. “Has this all been a game to you? My dreams and ambitions, a joke in your ‘exquisite’ mind?”</p><p>“We could enter this partnership as equals.” It was something he had convinced himself over the past few weeks as he waited for the day that the other shoe was going to drop. </p><p>“Do you not wish to marry for love?” Her voice was dripping with desperation, looking for a way out of her fate. </p><p>“I have never been afforded the luxury of thinking that way.” Alex paused as Eliza looked at him incredulously. “Could we not... love each other?” </p><p>Still, filled with an unmatched rage, Eliza let the words tumble out of her mouth. “I will never love you.” For the second time that day, she left a room in a fury of emotion, and the man behind the door was left stunned.</p><p>~</p><p>The next morning in his session with John, Alex blocked out all thought of the night prior with vigorous exercise. At first, John thought nothing of it, but the look of wear on his face was too intense to go unnoticed. </p><p>“If you punch that any harder, you’re actually going to hurt yourself.” Alex continued to punch the punching bag, ignoring John’s comment. “It can’t fight back, Alexander. Give it a rest.”</p><p>Alex sighed, stopping and taking off his gloves as he worked to regain his breath. “Never thought you’d tell me to stop.”</p><p>“Well, you don’t normally try to kill the punching bag. Besides, your form was horrible.” Alex shot him a look of annoyance, but brushed it off. “So, what’s going on?”</p><p>“Why does something have to be going on? I’m just letting off a little steam.” It was John’s turn to give Alex a look. They had created a sort of back and forth in the past month. John was almost his... friend. So, he gave in fairly easily. “Eliza and I had a falling out last night.”</p><p>“A lover’s quarrel?” John teased, and Alex’s face flushed. </p><p>“She found out we are promised to be wed, and that she will not be permitted to apprentice under her father.” John’s face was as stoic as ever, but Alex could almost detect a trace of disappointment, and he had become accustomed to hiding his elation at breaking him down.</p><p>“Why is she upset with you then? Isn’t that the King’s decision?” This was not a discussion that Alex had ever chosen to have with John before, but it was time. He could not shake the look on Eliza’s face from his mind.</p><p>“I knew weeks prior, and kept the information from her,” he sighed. </p><p>John considered this, studying Alex’s face of shame and sadness. “Is that all?”</p><p>Surprised, Alex replied, “What do you mean?”</p><p>“Your face reads of something more.” John was a man of few words, and even with so little words, he always took Alex by surprise. This was no exception. Again, he was right.</p><p>“She expressed that she would never love me.” The words rang in his ears, loud and unwavering. I will never love you.</p><p>John’s face softened momentarily, and Alex found himself staring at the freckles that dotted his face. He hoped that he would say something prolific that allowed him to simply forget, but it was rare that he got something he wanted from John. </p><p>He got on his feet. “Another lap, Hamilton. Break’s over.” Alex obliged, finally keeping up with the man beside him.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. The Stampede</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>“I have been cooped up in this castle my whole life, Father. I know what you are afraid of, but I am ready."</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>That same morning, Eliza and Angelica sat in their quarters in stoic silence. At this point, Eliza had simply run out of tears, and her anger had subsided, resigned to her future life as the Queen of their nation. Angelica had apologized in the same manner as Alex - a chorus of ‘I knew and I’m sorry’s that meant nothing to her. More than anything, she claimed that she ‘didn’t want to crush her dreams’. </p><p>“You have so much time, Eliza,” Angelica said softly. “It is not as if you are becoming Queen tomorrow.”</p><p>“Yes, but that is still what I will become,” she replied, her face hard and unforgiving. “I wish you had not allowed me to dream at all.” With that, they succumbed to silence once more, Angelica reading her book and Eliza scribbling furiously in her journal.</p><p>A few moments later, Alex arrived, knocking hesistantly on their door. Angelica answered, and Eliza barely spared him a glance. </p><p>“Prince Alexander,” she curtsied. “We weren’t expecting your visit.”</p><p>“Since when do I need an invitation?” He smiled lightly, looking over her shoulder to where Eliza sat. “Although, I suppose I need one now.”</p><p>“Do come in,” Angelica responded. Who was she to say no to the prince? Still, Eliza’s eyes did not rise from her journal, but her face was flushed with intensity as Alex entered the room.</p><p>“Eliza, I was hoping we could talk,” he said in an almost sheepish manner. Even in her fury, Eliza noted that she had never heard him speak so softly. It was strange.</p><p>Ever the older sister, Angelica scolded her. “Elizabeth, don’t ignore him.”</p><p>“I have nothing to say,” she replied plainly, yet setting her book aside. </p><p>Nervously, Alex looked over his shoulder. “Would you mind giving us a moment? I believe your father is looking for you, Ang.” Then, he smiled that million dollar smile that helped him win over the Kingdom. She left with a nod and a prayer that Eliza would be kind.</p><p>After the door was shut, he sat down next to her and she turned to the side. “Eliza, please...” Alex said with a tone of begging. “You’re my best friend.”</p><p>“Don’t you mean your betrothed?” She replied sarcastically. </p><p>He shook his head a little. “No, I don’t.” He took her hand. “Everything I said before, I meant. I think you would be a wonderful aide, and I think our partnership could be the best thing for this kingdom.” </p><p>Eliza paused. “I hate that you’ve been keeping this from me, Alex. I really do.” She turned to him, a look of exhaustion streaking her face. “It’s going to take me a minute, but I will not abandon you.” Eliza took a deep breath. “But I cannot promise love.”</p><p>“Neither can I,” he said quickly, blushing. “I mean, I love you, but I don’t ‘love’ you. You know?”</p><p>She smiled lightly. “I am so, ridiculously mad at you.” </p><p>He let out a breathy laugh. “Yeah, I deserve that.”</p><p>THREE YEARS LATER</p><p>In a blink of an eye, Prince Alexander and Queen in training Eliza Schuyler are eighteen years old. Alexander has excelled in John’s training, so much so that they start to challenge one another rather than John always taking the lead. Alexander has decided that he wants to go to University away from the Kingdom, and the King was hesitant. </p><p>“Come with me on a visit,” Alex insisted. “I’ll show you that this is where I am meant to be.”</p><p>“We can find you the finest tutors, Alexander. You’ll learn all you need to know,” the King replied that night at dinner, cool and even keeled as he always was. </p><p>John gave Alex a look of encouragement, and he continued. “But I will not understand the will of the people! I need to be with them to learn their needs; to serve them the best that I can. I will not be a subpar ruler.” </p><p>Still, the King did not look convinced, so John decided it was time to jump in. “We could set up a private tour. My father and I can secure the perimeter. Trust me, at this point, Alex is as capable as I to accompany you.”</p><p>“I have been cooped up in this castle my whole life, Father. I know what you are afraid of, but I am ready,” Alex insisted. All the while, the Schuylers ate quietly listening to the exchange. Silently, Eliza wished he would stay, so she could continue to study alongside him.</p><p>The King, responding better to John’s voice of reason and the hope in Alex’s voice, sighed. “I suppose a visit would not hurt. It’s not a commitment, but I will consider it. Understood?”</p><p>Alex grinned. “Understood.” </p><p>For the next two weeks, John and Alex extensively prepared for the tour of the school with Mr. Laurens, who continued to assure the King that the whole thing would be secure. John, Eliza, and Alex had become something like friends since they were all close in age and Angelica had begun looking for marriage prospects outside the castle. </p><p>The day of the tour, they were all sitting in Alex’s quarters as he paced the room, unable to calm his anxiety. “I’ve done extensive research and I just know it, I know this is the school. He’s going to have to see it my way.”</p><p>“I’m sure it’ll be fine, Alex,” Eliza sighed, flipping through her book. </p><p>“Maybe instead of talking, you should do push ups to get your energy out,” John said, raising a brow. Alex stopped in his tracks, sighed, and sat down next to him. “It’s your life, Alexander. The Royal Family hasn’t had so much as a scare since we arrived. Your Father will understand, and you’ll be attending before you know it.”</p><p>Surprisingly, Alex actually took a deep breath and his heart rate slowed slightly. John always had a candid way of putting things, and his candor made Alex see things more clearly. It was like magic. </p><p>“Right, right...” Alex trailed. “There’s nothing to worry about.” Still, he couldn’t shake a feeling of unease. </p><p>Eliza looked up from her book, her eyes softening. “Alex,” she insisted in her melodic tone. “There’s nothing to worry about. I promise. John and his Father have everything covered.” John nodded, and Alex produced a smile for both of their sakes. </p><p>~</p><p>“And this is our library. It was fortified in 1702 and named after...” The tour guide droned on as Alex and the King trailed behind him. All Alex could do was look up and marvel at the architecture, and the sheer amount of books in the damn place, all filled with words that Alex would have the opportunity to read. </p><p>The King looked over at his son, seeing the wonder on his face, and muttered underneath the monologue of the guide. “Alexander, I understand where you’re coming from. You deserve this experience just like any other boy.”</p><p>“I feel a ‘but’ coming on,” Alex replied, sticking his hands in his pockets as he walked. </p><p>“But I am worried for your safety,” he said softly. “I want you to be the most capable King this Kingdom has ever seen, and I know that includes a real education, but what good will it do if you’re dead?”</p><p>Alex was startled by his bluntness. “Father-” </p><p>“Forgive me, Alexander, but you need to understand the true gravity of our situation.” His face turned serious and cold, but mostly painted with worry. </p><p>“Follow me now to the men’s dormitory,” the tour guide said a bit loudly, knowing he was being ignored. The King gave him a polite smile and continued his conversation.</p><p>“If the Kingdom were to fall into the wrong hands, it would be detrimental. I trust you, Alexander, but I want you to be alive to see the day that you become King.”</p><p>Alex nodded, considering his words. “I understand, Father. I do. I’ll take John with me, a whole security team if I have to.” He paused, trying to limit his words. “Please, Father. This is what I want.”</p><p>After what Alex felt like was an eternity, the King nodded. “Then it will happen.”</p><p>Alex grinned and was about to say thank you when the tour guide cut him off. “Why don’t you take a look inside a room?” He motioned to the solid, oak door and the King nodded, opening it himself. </p><p>In the coming weeks, Alex wouldn’t be able to get the following three seconds out of his brain, even when he slept. The King had barely opened the door before a shot rang out, and the tour guide ran down the hallway in the other direction. Alex watched in horror as his father fell to the ground and suddenly the gun was pointed in his direction. Immediately, all of his instincts took over and he was able to knock the gun out of the masked man’s hand and throw him to the ground. Without a second thought, Alex shot the guy, and ran to his Father’s side. </p><p>He was already gone. </p><p>“Dad? DAD?!” He screamed, holding his head in his hands.</p><p>Hearing the shot, John and Mr. Laurens finally arrived, recognizing the colossal failure of security laid out before them. John took Alex by the shoulders and pulled him off of his father’s body. “Hamilton, we have to take him to a doctor. Let go, let go!” </p><p>“He’s dead!” Alex wailed. Mr. Laurens made quick work of carrying the king, and getting him out of Alex’s sight and to a doctor, even though he knew there was no use in taking him to a doctor. John held Alex tightly on the ground, not saying anything as Alex screamed in horror. </p><p>Minutes later, when Alex’s eyes began to clear but his brain was still as scrambled as before, he turned to John in horror. “We have to go. We- we have to leave. I can’t go back.”</p><p>John locked eyes with him and knew, for some strange reason, that he would follow Alex to the ends of the Earth if he simply just asked. He nodded, and helped him stand. “Okay. Let’s go.”</p><p>“Really?” Alex asked, out of breath and manic. </p><p>“Yes,” John said definitively. The man still dead on the floor, the two of them ran out of the room and off the campus.</p>
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<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Exile</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>"I will always stay."</p>
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    <p>John and Alexander made it about fifteen miles before the sun went down and the two of them simply collapsed from exhaustion. They slept outside, on the ground, over the border of the Kingdom: three things that went against every bone in John’s body, but neither of them could come up with something better in the pandemonium. </p><p>The next morning, Alex was the first to wake up, the bright light of the morning giving him an unwelcome greeting. He looked over at John, his face soft with sleep, and suddenly the memory of the previous day came flooding in and his heart rate sped up.</p><p>“John, John!” He exclaimed, shaking him lightly. “Wake up!” </p><p>John groaned, rubbing his face. “I’m awake, I’m awake.” He blinked, looking around at their surroundings and remembering their predicament as well. “Shit.”</p><p>“Oh my god... What are we going to do?” Alex asked, looking down at his hands that were still crusted with blood. </p><p>“We have to get you back,” John said immediately, standing and brushing his legs off. “The Queen will be frantic, and you need to take your rightful place on the throne.”</p><p>Alex shook his head, still grief stricken and exhausted. “I can’t go back. I won’t go back.”</p><p>“Alex-”</p><p>“John, I watched my Father die! I watched him get shot, and then killed someone in response when I could have been saving my Father.” John looked at him with concern and pity. “I will not go back. I do not deserve to be their King. If you need to go back, I understand, but do not tell them where I have gone.”</p><p>John paused. “And where will you have gone?”</p><p>“I will figure something out,” Alex said, shaking his head. “I will live in exile.”</p><p>John furrowed his brows. “You’re being completely illogical. If anything, it is your duty to return. The kingdom will be counting on you,” he insisted. “You did not murder your father.”</p><p>“I didn’t save him either,” Alex snapped. </p><p>“And Eliza?” </p><p>“She will be better off without me. She will not be forced to marry me.” </p><p>John considered this for a moment. “Then I will stay with you.”</p><p>“You mean that?” He replied, drawing in a shaky breath.</p><p>“I will always stay.” </p><p>~</p><p>It took thirty minutes of searching for the Prince and his son and another thirty driving before Henry Laurens was able to reach the castle. Alex and John had not left a trace, and Henry was sure that they had been captured despite his son’s best efforts. Still, he had a duty to the kingdom, and he had to make sure that the Queen was sworn in before anyone else claimed that right to the throne. The capture of the Prince and his son would have to come second. </p><p>He burst through the main entrance, searching for the Queen, and failing to keep his composure. “Bring me the Queen!” He yelled to his staff, but no one seemed to know where she and her closest aide had gone. </p><p>Instead, he found the Schuyler sisters.</p><p>“Mr. Laurens?” Eliza said with as much force as she could muster up. </p><p>“The King is dead,” he said quickly, the emotion absent from his voice. “The Prince and my son are missing, presumed to be captured, or even dead. I will not ask again. Where is the Queen?”</p><p>Eliza’s face paled, and she thanked God that Angelica had her wits about her. “The throne room.” Mr. Laurens sprinted off in that direction, and the girls were quick to follow. </p><p>As they ran, Eliza looked to Angelica, a wild look in her eye and willed herself not to cry. ‘It’s okay,’ Angelica mouthed. </p><p>Eliza shook her head, a horrible, sinking feeling in her stomach that something was seriously and undeniably wrong. </p><p>Like the climax of an action movie, Henry pushed the doors open, ready to save the day. Instead, he found the estranged brother of the late King with a crown on his head and the Queen by his side.</p><p>“You’re too late,” Ben smiled with a casual nature that unnerved the entire room. “Bow down to your King.” </p><p>“That’s not true,” Mr. Laurens spit. “You are not the rightful heir to the throne. Prince Alexander is. He is still alive.”</p><p>Ben did not seem surprised by this news whatsoever. With ease, he replied, “The prince is dead. He was killed by those horrible vagrants that killed King George. We received word only moments ago, at which point I was sworn in.”</p><p>Eliza choked out a sob, her knees going weak at the news. Angelica caught her as she continued to cry, her worst fear coming true. </p><p>Not willing to go down with a fight, Henry challenged him again. “How did you know to be at the castle? How can we be certain that the Prince is dead?” </p><p>“Call it lucky,” he smirked. “Search for the boy all you want. You won’t find him.” </p><p>The Queen, grief stricken and quiet, finally decided to use her voice. “If Alexander is alive, he will return and take his rightful place on the throne. I know my son.” She paused, trying her best not to waver. “In the meantime, we will search for his body if it is true he is dead. I am still the Queen, I can still give orders.”</p><p>Ben seemed almost amused by her confidence. “Of course you can, my dear. Send all of the search parties you’d like. In the meantime, I will be here to rule this country.”</p><p>Mr. Schuyler cleared his throat. “My daughter and I will lead the search, my lady.” Eliza wiped her eyes, her face flushed at her outburst. As her father’s apprentice, it was no surprise that Angelica would be the one to work to find Alex. Yet again, she would just have to sit back and wait. </p><p>“I want Elizabeth to work with you,” the Queen replied, much to Eliza’s surprise. “He is to be her husband. Perhaps if you find him, he will be more responsive to her.” Mr. Schuyler nodded, and Eliza would have smiled if she thought Alex to be alive. If Alex was alive, he would return.</p><p>He would not abandon them. </p><p>~</p><p>It took Alex and John all of five minutes before they realized that they would need to go into hiding. If he knew his Mother, then he knew that she would not let him go without a fight. Still, if she knew the horrors of the reality of his situation, she would never speak to him again. She would never forgive him for not acting quick enough to save her husband. So they had to find a place to hide.</p><p>John knew of a safe house in a neighboring kingdom that they could stay in. It was in a mountain range, well beyond the towns that surrounded it. Their life there would not be easy, but they only needed to bide their time before people forgot the face of the missing prince, and they could live among the masses.</p><p>The house was small, but comfortable. From the moment they walked into the door, there was a feeling of home that washed over the both of them. After they got their bearings, John said, “I’m going to go into town and get some essentials.”</p><p>John had not asked Alex again about going back to the castle, but he knew that it was on his mind. Regardless, he was grateful for the peace. “I can go with you.”</p><p>“We can’t risk anyone recognizing you, if this is still what you want.”</p><p>Alex nodded. “How long will you be gone?”</p><p>“Should take two hours round trip, if I remember correctly.”</p><p>“Maybe you should get a horse while you’re at it,” Alex chuckled, but was met with John’s stony, serious face. “I’m sorry, I know this isn’t what you want.”</p><p>“But it’s what you want, and I will protect you until the day I die,” he replied, his face unchanged.</p><p>“You did not make that oath,” Alex replied, confused. “You do not owe me that.”</p><p>“I know,” John said decidedly, and was out the door before Alex could figure out what he meant by that.</p>
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<a name="section0007"><h2>7. Winter</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>"The shame on his face was unmistakable, and John wished there was something that he could do to make his pain go away."</p>
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    <p>John and Alex settled into a good rhythm after a few months of finding their way in the safe house. John would travel to get the supplies, Alex found a new love in cooking, and they complimented each other in little ways. It was simple - easy, even. They could almost forget what they left behind. </p><p>“It’s going to get cold soon,” John said one morning over breakfast. </p><p>Alex tapped his fingers on the table. “There’s a few pine trees to the west. We can chop them down for kindling.” </p><p>John nodded and went back to his food. Alex found him to be an easy presence to be around, but he was a man of few words and it was starting to make Alex restless. In a matter of months, he had almost finished the reading material lining the bookshelves of the tiny house. Sometimes he would ask John to look for a novel while he was out, but they had limited money. Alex had never been so limited before. </p><p>The truth of the matter was that Alex didn’t know what he would have done without John. He couldn’t risk being seen in public, so John always went out. Plus he knew how to do a lot of the things around the house without any money involved. </p><p>Alex often found himself just watching him as he methodically went about his day. He would try to help him wherever he could, but John worked better alone and Alex knew it. He reveled in the times that he could just stare while John’s mind was off in another place.</p><p>“You’re doing it again,” John said, snapping Alex out of his trance.</p><p>“What?” He replied innocently.</p><p>“Bouncing your leg. Staring at me,” he said plainly. “You’re getting bored, Alexander.”</p><p>Alex sighed. “Is it that obvious?”</p><p>Even when Alex thought that he was being sneaky, John knew that he was watching him. More than anything, he wanted to shake him and tell him that he was being ridiculous. That his place was on the throne. Alex was smarter than he let on, and John knew that if he could get over his ridiculous pride, he would be the best King the country had ever seen. </p><p>That man, the man that John had chosen to serve and protect, was staring at him day in and day out. It only made sense that he would flex his muscles now and again just to see that man blush and turn away.</p><p>“I do not know how to keep you occupied until the end of time,” John said with a tilt in his voice that could almost be mistaken for teasing. </p><p>“Not until the end of time, just until people forget,” Alex replied, breaking their eye contact. </p><p>“It’s been a few months and you think you can last years?” Amused, John reached under the table and pressed down on his vibrating leg. The blush on Alex’s face was unmistakable, even when he thought he was being discreet. Over the years, John had come to know every tell that the man had. “I give it two more months at maximum.” </p><p>Alex sighed. “How are you handling this so well?” John still didn’t move his hand.</p><p>“My father and I lived a very simple life before we came to the castle. Even then, we didn’t exactly live in luxury. I didn’t have a million things to entertain me, or friends, even. Certainly nothing like you had with the Schuyler sisters.”</p><p>“It’ll just take a little more time to adjust,” Alex said, taking in a deep breath and willing himself to have a bit more patience and clarity like the man in front of him. </p><p>John hesitated. “Or...”</p><p>“John-”</p><p>“We haven’t discussed it in weeks. I thought it was time to bring it up again. We don’t have to stay here, Alex.”</p><p>“Even now when I return I will be the coward that left the country at its time of need.” He shook his head. “I’ll find a way to live here until the country forgets my name and my face.”</p><p>The shame on his face was unmistakable, and John wished there was something that he could do to make his pain go away. “You’re still grieving, Alex. It’s okay,” he conceded. </p><p>“You’ll still stay?” Alex asked this frequently, and John always had the same answer.</p><p>“Always.” John finally removed his hand from Alex’s thigh, and he immediately found himself missing the feeling of his touch.</p><p>~</p><p> </p><p>In the time that had passed, Eliza and her father had conducted six separate searches for the missing prince, only for them all to be unsuccessful. Still, Eliza refused to give up hope. </p><p>“Where are you headed next?” Angelica asked that morning as she watched Eliza prep for their journey. She had started to sit at Alex’s old desk, hoping that it would give her a clue as to where he was. </p><p>“Northeast quadrant of the Kingdom. Closest town to the outskirts before it becomes uncharted.” Eliza looked up, her face worn from exhaustion. “If Ben were to give us more materials, we could go beyond the confines, but he refuses.” </p><p>“Have you ever considered that perhaps Alexander really is dead as he says? I wouldn’t put it past Ben to...” It was too horrible to even say aloud.</p><p>Eliza shook her head vigorously. She refused to let herself to think that he had been murdered and left for dead. “I think it’s more probable that he just doesn’t want to be found.”</p><p>Angelica furrowed her brows. “You think he’s in hiding?”</p><p>“Which is why we need to search beyond the confines of the kingdom!” Eliza sighed. “Even if he does not want to be found, we need him. He needs to return.”</p><p>“Are you sure that’s all it is?”</p><p>“He’s our last hope,” Eliza said firmly. </p><p>~</p><p> </p><p>As John predicted, the cold came rather quickly following their conversation at breakfast. John hadn’t had the time to chop any firewood, and the few blankets that they had weren’t enough to keep them warm. At two in the morning, after John’s fingers were completely chilled to the bone, he appeared in Alex’s doorway.</p><p>Unsurprisingly, Alex was wide awake. His mind plus the unrelenting nature of the cold wouldn’t let him sleep. “John?” He said in a hoarse voice. “Is everything okay?”</p><p>Embarrassed, John shifted his weight and replied, “It’s freezing.”</p><p>“Very astute,” Alex blinked. </p><p>“I was thinking we could... preserve our heat.” He said awkwardly, his normal lack of words becoming a loss of words. “I don’t know what else to do. We could get sick.”</p><p>Shaking any other notions out of his mind, Alex nodded and opened up his own blanket. “Come on, then.” </p><p>Carefully, John climbed into bed with him, wrapping his arms around him without a second of thought. Alex settled into him, grateful for the warmth of another person, and even more grateful that the person was John. </p><p>“John?” He whispered. </p><p>“Yes?”</p><p>“Please stay.”</p><p>“Always,” he whispered back. The loneliness of the cold all but melted away.</p>
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